For all our lovely freeloaders out there, this one is for you. Festivals are enormously fun, with a slew of art and entertainment in one place. But of course, you require a ticket to access all this awesomeness. A ticket, which is often quite expensive. So instead of saving up and trying to afford that ticket – like a noob – try some of the following things. Take a look at some of The Sherp’s expert tips on how to get a free festival ticket!
1. Befriend the festival organizer.
Because if anyone can get you a free ticket, it’s them. Turn your charm on and prepare to acquire a new BFF.
2. If that doesn’t work, stalk them.
3. Or better yet, blackmail them.
This ought to get their attention.
4. Become a Twitter “fan.”
This basically means berrating the festival on social media using tweets. Make them aware of your presence and your love for the music at the festival. About seventy tweets a day should do the trick.
5. Try bartering something in exchange.
Like your kidneys.
6. Make the artist notice you.
You know who doesn’t have to buy a festival pass? The artists, and their entourage. If you can get the artist to take notice of you, it’s only a matte rof time before you become best friends with them. A great way to do this is to declare yourself the ultimate fan using grand gestures. Maybe tattoo their name on your chest, or forehead.
7. Or try convincing the organizer that you’re related to the artist.
Like this guy right here.
8. Flash festival security.
From personal experience, this one never fails.
9. Or convince them that you work for the festival.
How hard can it be to steal the uniform worn by the organizers? They do it in movies all the time.
10. Kill someone and steal their ticket.
No pain, no gain.
11. Or (as crazy as this might sound) buy a ticket.
Seriously, you gotta stop being such a miser. Buy a fucking pass.
(Note: All of the heinous acts suggested above are meant to be ironic, please don’t execute them IRL. Obviously. Also, the whole purpose of this piece is that if you want a festival ticket, just buy it. Peace and love, folks.)
(All GIFs via:: GIPHY)