Let’s just come out and say it – music festivals are incomplete without these intoxicated, living-like-there’s-no-tomorrow individuals we call drunkards. They are awkward, annoying and borderline nonsensical but they make for the funniest stories and some great experiences. So The Sherp is here to celebrate (and make some good-natured jokes on) our drunken friends, foes and if you’re one—don’t be shy, we’ve all been through the morning after.
1. The Freaky Dancer
(Gif Courtesy: hilariousgif.com)
This person transforms into a human blender post their third drink. Their signature move can be any form of weird from the conventional snake dance to the borderline-possessed Emily Rose/Walking Dead move.
Can Be Found: Trying to initiate a group dance and failing due to flailing limbs and lack of hand-eye coordination.
2. The Nudist
This is the hippie that went too far. We don’t know if it’s the heat or the “feels” that get to them but the band gets on stage and their shirt comes off. It’s quite beautifully coordinated if you notice.
Can Be Found: headbanging fiercely and sweating profusely. Like we said, too many feels.
3. The Overly Affectionate Drunkard
This individual is a one sided version of the PDA couple. Give them enough alcohol and they’re in love with everyone. From the person they came to the festival with to the bartender. And they like to express their love through lots and lots of sweaty hugs.
Can Be Found: Proclaiming over and over, “I love you guys so much!”
4. The Well-Fueled Machine
(Gif Courtesy: vibe.com)
This dude downs beers like they’re Gatorade. Alcohol is fuel to them and it only makes them party harder.
Can Be Found: Going at it in a mosh pit like their life depends on it.
5. The Touchniss Everfeel
Not to be confused with the Overly Affectionate Drunkard, Touchniss Everfeel a.k.a. Mr. Sleazeball likes to touch/grope/grind/hump anything he can get his hands on. Unlike our OAD, this guy is all about being handsy whether it’s a person, dog or a phone booth.
Can Be Found: Not-so-sneakily trying inappropriate moves on unsuspecting festival-goers, e.g., the very popular Creepy Drunk Uncle move.
6. The Hot Mess
The Hot Mess, as the name suggests, is all over the place. Spilling drinks and tripping over flat ground, this person is a walking disaster and loves every minute of it.
Can Be Found: Curled into a fatal position the next morning with no clue as to how they got there.
Which type of drunk festival-goer are you?
(Cover Image Courtesy: ytimg.com)